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Sean: evil-spirited grandiosity and hypocrisy
Sean’s persona (how he presents himself):
“I am a young skeptic who wants to understand the world and who cherishes sound logic, intellectually honesty, intellectual humility, straightforward language and many other virtues I want to increase in this world.”
Sean accepts Gayatri’s vague “faux-pology” to the group without a second thought. A hints that Gayatri’s “act of good will” may not be straightforward or honest and that there is reason to be skeptical about her motives.
Aug 24, 2011, at 11:37, Sean DeButts wrote:
Act of good will accepted!
Aug 24, 2011 at 11:48 PM, A wrote:
Act of good will or request for a carte blanche?
Aug 24, 2011, at 11:51 , Sean DeButts wrote:
A, I don’t entirely understand what you meant by that, but it sounded snide. I will ignore all such future emails from you.
“I want to be consistently skeptical about everything. Before asserting that I believe a statement is true, I want evidence and undergone reasoning strong enough to allay my doubts.”
Aug 24, 2011, at 11:59 , A wrote:
You don’t understand, yet you are ready to judge. That is disappointing.
Aug 25, 2011 at 1:32 AM, A wrote:
Actually, Sean, there is nothing insulting or “snide” in my question to you. Your email to me, on the other hand, is most definitely rude.
Thu, Aug 25, 2011 at 1:43 AM, Sean DeButts wrote:
A, stop spamming my email account. This is called me sticking up for myself.
Aug 25, 2011, at 1:51, A wrote:
Call it whatever you want. Anyone else would call it rude.
To penalize A for her doubts and her straightforward responses to his hostile provocations, Sean broadcasts her private correspondence.
Aug 25, 2011, at 2:18 , Sean DeButts wrote:
I apologize for forwarding your emails to everyone as I did; that I shouldn’t have done, but I did perceive your first email as being rude. However, if that wasn’t your intent, I take back what I said.
It is not possible to “take back” actions once committed, of course. Now aware that A has expressed doubt about her “act of good will” to Sean, Gayatri erupts in narcissistic rage and spews out her unexplained hatred and malevolence without inhibitions; thereby blatantly confirming that her disingenuous “faux-pology” indeed was a manipulative act of pretense.
Aug 25, 2011 2:51 AM, A wrote:
To: Sean DeButts
Cc: The group
Sean,
Would you mind explaining why you sent my personal correspondence to the list? That is ALWAYS wrong, in my view.
Critical thinking takes much time and practice to master. If it is something that you aspire to, and if you care about truthfulness, then taking responsibility for your perceptions, withholding judgment, and civility, are of paramount importance.
Gayatri calls upon a group of unquestioning personality disordered male enablers for support. She addresses these ‘useful idiots’ as “real men” and treats them as heroes for protecting her … from accountability for her abusive behavior. They bully Gayatri’s target and perpetuate her smear campaign. When A asks for a reason, she is accused of harassment. The unexplained, open hostility towards A ends as the callous contempt of stonewalling begins. A is socially rejected and isolated—without explanation. She asks why she is treated this way but no one will speak with her. The group has become a self-validating sociopathic alliance. People who lack empathy feel no reason to explain their abusive behavior.
Questions: Where, in this exchange or elsewhere, does Sean seek understanding or lean on evidence? Where is the skepticism, the intellectual honesty and humility, the logic and directness, or any other virtues he claims to cherish? Gandhi’s famous words come to mind: Be the change you want to see in the world. People who are deep in denial probably aren’t capable of doing that.
About apologies: Is an ‘apology’ containing a but or an if really sincere? No. How about an ‘apology’ without any recognition of the harm done? No. Without empathy for the victim and a sense of responsibility for the consequences of misconduct, “I apologize.” are empty words, or worse, a method of evading responsibility and deterring criticism. If empty gestures are unsatisfactory for the victim, she may meet strong criticism and be silenced by peer pressure. “Everyone knows that everyone is supposed to accept an apology and act as if whatever happened never happened.” The abuser is off the hook as his evil deeds fade from the bystanders’ memories, and instead, the spotlight is on the victim, who is made to look like the bad guy if she doesn’t conform to the rules of the mob. It happens all the time.
More food for thought: The Fake Apology
Eastside Hypocrisy 